A Clockwork Yellow

Article

Maybe it was lack of sleep, or perhaps catching A Clockwork Orange on cable late last night which made this article pique my interest. Either way, a nineteen year-old university student, Philip Laing, was warned today he could be facing jail time amongst other punishments. His crime? The young lad got drunk, and then he urinated on a war memorial.

The event was photographed and published in a national newspaper. Laing, a Sheffield Hallam University student, was then arrested and charged by the Sheffield Police. Laing told the police he was "very, very drunk, the drunkest I've ever been since I've been at university."

Laing drank a bottle of firewater before attending a drinking event sponsored by a private company, Carnage UK. As if there weren't enough issues with college raves, Carnage UK tours throughout the UK organizing student drinking events for students at the various establishments across England.

"The image of your urinating over the poppy wreath on the war memorial in this city will make most turn away in disgust, shock and sadness," said District Judge Anthony Browne.

"It has undoubtedly distressed and upset many. The war memorial is a sacred and a special place."

"Carnage is the name of the organization who promote this type of activity and some might say that somebody should be standing alongside you this morning," the judge said.

One might see this as the ultimate anti-war statement, but don't get out the tie-dye shirt and peace-symbol necklace just yet. If you're looking for any meaning or statement in Laing's actions, you need only remember he is a member of today's society and generation. Which means anything he did had absolutely no meaning or purpose.

I guess it's true, wasted looks the same no matter where you are.

Prosecutor Ian Conway said Laing had immediately admitted the offence when arrested and told police he was "very, very drunk, the drunkest I've ever been since I've been at university."

"The disgusting and reprehensible act the defendant carried out was in no way premeditated, targeted or politically motivated," Conway said.

"His actions were sadly the result of having consumed large amounts of alcohol."

Laing told officials he has absolutely no recollection of his actions whatsoever. His lawyer has stated Laing is merely a victim of today's culture of drinking far too much, and "It's difficult to articulate just how embarrassed and ashamed this young man is." We should, however, feel relieved that there is no one-armed man holding a beer bong in all of this, Laing has pled guilty to his actions, and is prepared to take whatever comes to him. Afterall, it can't be worse than the hangover.